心声

命里有时终须有 命里无时莫强求
我只能真心付出 别的 我毕竟不能管那么多

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090909

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Never had i ever expected that 090909 would be the last day my dad stayed with us at home. We walked him the last journey that very morning, passed by our old house aka his office and sent him off for cremation. Every steps on the street holding onto his hearse were the heaviest footsteps ever for me to complete that journey. It was certainly a loss to our family but on the bright side, dad did not suffer that long, he did not want to bring trouble to us i guess as he was supposed to start kidney dialysis the following week, as we went to learn about dialysis in the hospital that very afternoon when my late father passed on in the evening. i can still feel the warmth of his body when i touched him that time but it became colder and colder. i can see he had what bro last bought him in his mouth, his favourite food - mamak rice. To make myself feel better, at least i spent the last few days for hours each with him sitting by his bed talking, joking, fetching water, medicine, food, changi...
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人，在不同的阶段，往往有不同的想法。 不同的时候，听到某些歌曲，会有特别的感触。最近成为我重播曲第一名的莫过于这首“ 外面的世界 ”。勾起了好多美丽的回忆，好久都没好好安静的一个人在房里听着歌，翻阅些旧照片，翻读些旧信息。发现好多的小细节都似乎已藏到记忆里的某一个角落。有些当时把它看成比什么都重要的事情，现在看起来它反而是件芝麻小豆的事。有些当时为它哭得死去活来的事情，现在看起来它反而是件让我成长的东西。有些当时执著万分的事情，现在看起来都不以为然了。 最重要的是，看着。。。想着。。。听着。。。那些照片，回忆及歌曲，它们还是勾起了我的嘴角，微笑了。: )
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